Goodbye, my Tina
by chang-squared
Summary: Bruno Mars 'When I was your man' The songs take on Mike and Tinas' relationship


I never sang up until my senior year, when you pushed him too do it, no one could have done that, but you. YOU helped me in ways you would never know, and now I can't even thank you, because you refuse to see me. I don't blame you.

_Same bed but it feels just a little bit bigger now_

He's home, all the drama of being in Chicago is gone, he has a whole 5 weeks to spend with friends, and of course family. After a day traveling in his old beaten up Honda, he can't help but sigh in relief when his back touches the he foam mattress. He stops fighting the urge to keep his eyes open, lets them close, when his mind drifts to her, he remembers sharing the bed with her, cuddling under the covers and stealing kissing, he remembers sneaking out on schools nights to spend the night in her bed, he remember how much better it was sharing a bed.

_Our song on the radio bit don't sound the same_

**Ooh, oh, ooh, oh**

**Sweet love, yeah**

**I didn't mean it, when I said I didn't love you**

He was driving to Breadsticks to meet with Puck, Fin and Sam, when he heard it, he knew from the beginning tune what song was coming up, and he couldn't listen to it, not now, not ever, its only right when he is listening with her.

_When our friends talk about you, all it does is just tear me down 'Cause my heart breaks a little when I hear your name_

When he's at Breadsticks with the guys, Sam mentions something Tina did when he, Mercedes and Chris were double-dating. He felt the shiver slowly crawl up his spine at the mention of her laughing and enjoying herself with him, the other guy. He knows Sam notices his discomfort.

"Sorry man" Sam says bowing his head.

Mike took a while to answer, he knows he shouldn't want to rip Sam's face off; he knows the guy is only happy about him and Mercedes re-kindled love. But well, he stills wants to rip his face off. Mike looks up from his meal, and shrugs. Conversation begins to flow amongst the guys again, after the 30-second awkward spell, but in the back of Mike's mind he can't help but think about her. He misses her.

_It all just sounds like oooooh…. Mmm too young, too dumb to realize_

He took her for granted, all the small things she did for him. He didn't realize how much it would affect him when she wasn't there.

_That I should have bought you flowers, and held your hand. Should have gave you all my hours, when I had the chance_

He remembers the beginning of their relationship, he would turn up at her house spontaneously just to say hello, or for a quick kiss. Or her favourite to give her flowers and lay on her bed holding her close, and never letting go off her hand.

He then goes on to remember ignoring her calls, because hanging with the guys was more interesting, he remembers walking through the mall on one of the few dates the shared nearer the end of their relationship, he was more like a friend than anything else.

Now he sits and the waterfall, where they spent their first date. He cries, he cries more than he should, he regrets the stupid decisions he made, because when push comes to shove, no one is as important as her.

_Take you to every party, 'Cause all you wanted to do was dance_

He remembers going to parties on his own getting wasted with his friends, dancing with Brittany, when he knew she was sat at home, alone. All she wanted was to dance with him. He would see a text from her, he would just read it, ignore it, and claim he never saw it.

Why? Why would he do that to her? Everyone knew how much he loved her. But most people didn't know about the little cracks in their relationship, how he started to neglect her. There is no one who asks the question more than himself. Why Mike?

_Now my baby's dancing, but she's dancing with another man_

He saw them, her and Chris-Tina looked as flawless as ever, but Chris, he didn't fit her, he didn't fit on her arm like he did. Maybe he's just imagining it, but when he sees them arm-in-arm he can't help but think she looks so much better in his arms when they dance.

_My pride, my ego, my needs, and my selfish ways _

He had so much pride walking down the halls of McKinley with her holding his hand; he had her… at last. Without her, did he have pride?

His ego was shattered when he went to greet her at the class of 13' graduation party, the way she stared, laughed and walked away. He deserved it, but god, it hurt.

He needed her in all ways.

He regrets how selfish he was in the relationship, he should have treated her like a princess, but he thought he had her, he didn't realize he could actually lose her.

_Cause a good strong woman like you to walk out my life_

He knew he had lost the most perfect thing he could have asked for, and now he had to live with the consequences.

_Now I never, never get to clean up the mess I made, ohh… and it haunts me every time I close my eyes_

He would, in an instance get on his knees beg for her back, he would show everyone he was the biggest fool in the world for losing her, he would let her treat him the way he treated her, if he could just go back and have her back, but when it came down to it, for one, she wouldn't ever take him back, and most importantly two, he knows how happy Chris makes her, much happier than he made he, or so he's been told, and Tina's happiness was the most important thing.

_It all just sounds like ooooh… Mmm too young, too dumb to realize, that I should have bought you flowers and held your hand. Should have gave you all my hours when I had the chance. Take you to every party cause all you wanted to do was dance. Now my baby's, but she's dancing with another man._

He knew what he should have done.

_Although it hurts, I'll be the first to say that I was wrong. Oh, I know I'm probably much too late to try and apologize for my mistakes._

He would do the little things to hurt her, and then when she had enough, she would try and end it, and he would break his heart, begging for one more chance, and when she did give him the chance? He didn't do anything about it, just went back to his old ways, until she had endured 2 years, 7 months, and 12 days, she couldn't take it anymore, she blamed the distance, but he knew it was because of the entire heart ache he had put her through.

She didn't care, didn't even care when he cried her name when she left him in the middle of nowhere, after one of their heated argument. But this one was different; it would usually be them both acting of impulses, then making up crying in each other's arms, but this time, he was the one crying, and begging, whilst she walked away. No tears, no sympathy, maybe she had cried too much to care the time, maybe she had given him too many chances to sympathises this time, but all he knew for sure was, this was different, this was the end.

_But I just want you to know_

All he had left in him was to tell her

_I hope he buys you flowers_

_I hope he holds your hand_

_Give you all his hours_

_When he had the chance_

_Take you to every party_

The one thing he had to say was that he understands she doesn't feel the way he did, the one thing he wanted to say was to tell her how sorry he was, and how he only wanted her to be happy now. He knows he would never fully earn her full forgiveness, but as long as she knows he will be there whenever watching over her, he needed her to live her life the way she wants, then that will have to be enough for him.

I hope Chris treats you right Tina. I hope he does all the things you love to do, like dancing under the stars

_'Cause I remember how much you loved to dance_

I hope he does the things that you care about most, like sitting in on a Friday night, watching your favourite films, like stroking your hair when you're annoyed, supporting your every decision.

He should... _Do all the things I should have done._

_When I was your man._

He needs to… _Do all the things I should have done._

_When I was your man_

I hope he loves you like I love you Tina.

Please Tina, I'm begging you, be happy. That is all I want.

This is my final letter to you, all my others have been about how sorry I am, but this isn't, this could be goodbye.

This one is for you personally, I just wanted to show you how I felt, what I did, maybe from someone else point of view, but not mine, because I know you don't care for me and what I think.

Goodbye my Tina. I will love you forever, you were always the love of my life, but I can't sit around watching you spend the rest of your days with the love of your life.

I should have bought you flowers, when I was your man.

I love you, beautiful.

#

Tina held the hand written letter close to her heart and sobbed uncontrollably, gasping, she crooked the words "It was you, it was always going to be you"

It took exactly 2 months of agony to actually open this letter; she had it on her dresser, next to her favourite photo of herself and Mike. He was behind her, with his lips on her cheek, and her with an effortless smile.

-She had received the letter three days after Mike's death, Julie-Mike mother, had given it to her; she had turned up to Tina's house, with red rings around her eyes.

"Tina, this was in his pocket when they found him" Julie chocked out as she passed her a large envelop with 'My baby' Written neatly on it.

Tina just let the tears fall.

X


End file.
